IT Environmental Hazards


You would think that sitting at a desk, answering emails and phones, us geeks would have fairly safe jobs free of any dangers or other extreme ‘occupational hazards’. It’s not like we’re Chinese and in the 1800s trying to plant dynamite, thus earning the old quote “Not a Chinaman’s chance in hell.”. Well maybe that isn’t the case and we’re exposed to dangers of another type…..the type that burn your soul.

So here are the types of soul-quenching dangers we are exposed to in the cubical barnyard of our daily lives.

The constant emailer:

This little bugger sends out emails every minute of the day. The freaking power consumption from the never-ending network card usage is staggering. He’s the only one that has a network card that has it’s own power connector.

The mad keyboardist:

You can hear their clicks at least 3 cublicles away and it’s non-stop for hours on end. Makes you wonder how the company can afford to be replacing keyboards every week or so.

The cublicle clucker:

This guy chatters away with anyone. With a client who has a problem and everyone within a 20 cublicle radius can hear him. Avaya techs groan audibly when he calls with a phone problem. Many have committed suicide upon seeing his phone ID on the display.

The roaming gibbering mouther:

This annoying windbag talks so at least half-the floor can hear him and he walks around on his iPhone acting like he’s God’s Gift to saving the client from Ragnarok! Hell, even Odin consults him on occasion.

Personally, if you thinking of getting into IT, you might rather consider time travelling backwards and help make railroads…

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