A shining example.

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I’m pretty fortunate that I only deal with emails for the issues we deal with.  That way I don’t have to force myself to clamp down on the response I really want to say if I was on the phone with some of these people.  Here is a shining example.

This guy emails in his issue at 6am (our time, we deal globally).  I work on it for a couple of days (some issues just take awhile).  I find out that the guy who submitted the problem isn’t the authorized person and the changes he made can’t be done.  I tell him that he needs to talk to the authorized person and give him that person’s name and email address.  On the third day the client seems to ignore me.  I send out the generic ‘if we don’t hear back from you, we’ll assume that your issue is fixed and close your ticket’.

A collegue of mine neeeded some help with one of his tickets.  I go to help him out and immediate notice that the name is exactly the same as the one I’m working on!  All the details are the same, the person, the company, everything.  I check the time this ticket was  created, 7:30am.  That’s right, 1.5hrs after sending in the one i was working on, buddy goes and creates ANOTHER problem ticket.

So buddy now replies saying we need to keep BOTH tickets open!

One thing I have learned is how to bitch-slap people in the most diplomatic way possible without seeming to cross ‘the line’.  I told him that having two tickets open for the same issue will cause problems and even delay helping him fix the issue.  I said ‘Please keep this in mind for the future’.  Combined with my earlier wording I basically said “You are an idiot and a whiny little punk in  opening up two records thinking that it’ll get fixed quicker.  I had to work twice because now I have to manage two tickets instead of one.”

It’s bad enough when you are dealing with companies in other countries because of the time difference.  They send a request, we get  it basically the next day, we reply.  But now it’s their evening and they get it their next day….this all assumes that the client is attentive enough to pay attention and respond in a timely manner.

Now, I know that the logic of ‘getting the problem solved quicker by talking to two people at the same time’ has it’s use on the odd occasion….but in the corporate world of business….it just doesn’t work.  Here’s why:

Let say you got a problem with your computer like it can’t connect to the Internets.  So you call up your local ISP and complain. (Note that people always complain….they never ask if there is a problem….they used to but not any more….damn demanding public). Achmed, the helpdesk guy on the other end of the phone, has an idea on how to fix it but will need a bit of time.  So you hang up and let him call you back when he’s fixed.  The problem is you arein’t a patient person so you call back hoping that you’ll get someone more ‘competent’on the phone who can fix your problem.  Next on the line is Shagunthula (can you tell I’m mildly pissed at Bell and their India-outsourced helpdesk??).  She has an idea as wellon how to fix yoru connectivity issues but it will ‘take some time’ and will have to call you back.  You sigh, loudly and hang up waiting like the dog that needs to go outside and hope you get a call soon.

So now you have Achmed and Shagunthula both figthing with their ‘second level’ people to fix the same damn problem.  Now here’s the fun part.  Both of them have different ideas on how it’s to be fixed.  Confusion reigns, problems are exponentiated, emails, calls and voicemails are left all over the place and you are left sitting by the back door hoping that noone notices the little yellow puddle because this is taking too long.  You’ll probably go chew on the couch next and then blame the two ‘incompetent’ help desk people because they can’t get their ‘act together’ and fix your connectivity.

5 days later you finally get a call back.  It’s Achmed and he’s ‘fixed your problem’ and your connection is now up and running!  You tell them “I know…I just plugged in the loose cable….”.  Achmed commits ritual suicide while you surf for prOn.

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2 Responses to “A shining example.”

  1. Michael Says:

    Hey, have you seen this news article?
    New details about Michael Jackson’s Death Emerge
    I was wondering if you were going to blog about this…

    • The Jaded Tech Says:

      I’m just wondering if you really do read my posts…..and did you see _anything_ talked about outside of technology? It was sad to hear about the death and I was looking forward to any new music that may have come from the tour but other than this reply, you won’t see anything about it.

      For this transgression, I condemn you to a Commodore C=64 with a 300 Baud Pocket Modem for a week!

      And no you may NOT swap in the broadband card for the Modem!

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